My very own Resume – by G.W. Bush
-I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976
for driving under the influence of
alcohol.
-I pled guilty, paid a fine,
and had my driver’s license suspended for 30
days.
-My Texas driving record has been
“lost” and is not available.
MILITARY:
-I
joined the Texas Air National Guard and went
AWOL.
-I refused to take a drug test or
answer any questions about my drug
use.
-By joining the Texas Air National
Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in
Vietnam.
COLLEGE:
-I
graduated from Yale University with a low C
average.
-I was a
cheerleader.
PAST WORK
EXPERIENCE:
-I ran for U.S.
Congress and lost.
-I began my career
in the oil business in Midland, Texas, in
1975.
-I bought an oil company, but
couldn't find any oil in Texas.
-The
company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my
stock.
-I bought the Texas Rangers
baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer
money.
-With the help of my father and
our right-wing friends in the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was
elected governor of
Texas.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOV.
OF TEXAS:
-I changed Texas
pollution laws to favor power and oil companies, making Texas the most polluted
state in the Union.
-During my tenure,
Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog ridden city in
America.
-I cut taxes and bankrupted
the Texas treasury to the tune of billions in borrowed
money.
-I set the record for the most
executions by any governor in American
history.
-With the help of my brother,
the governor of Florida, and my father’s appointments to the Supreme
Court, I became President after losing by over 500,000
votes.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS
PRESIDENT:
-I am the first
President in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal
record.
-I invaded and occupied two
countries at a continuing cost of over one billion dollars per
week.
-I spent the U.S. surplus and
effectively bankrupted the U.S.
Treasury.
-I shattered the record for
the largest annual deficit in U.S.
history.
-I set an economic record for
most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month
period.
-I set the all-time record for
most foreclosures in a 12-month
period.
-I set the all-time record for
the biggest drop in the history of the U.S. stock
market.
-In my first year in office,
over 2 million Americans lost their jobs and that trend continues every
month.
-I’m proud that the
members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S.
history.
-My “poorest
millionaire,” Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after
her.
-I set the record for most
campaign fundraising trips by a U.S.
President.
-I am the all-time U.S. and
world recordholder for receiving the most corporate campaign
donations.
-My largest lifetime
campaign contributor, and one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the
largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in the
U.S.
-I refused to allow inspectors
access to U.S. “prisoners of war” detainees and thereby have refused
to abide by the Geneva Convention.
-I
am the first President in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors
(during the 2002 U.S. election).
-I set
the record for fewest number of press conferences of any President since the
advent of television.
-I set the
all-time record for most days on vacation in any one year
period.
-After taking off the entire
month of August, I presided over the worst security failure in U.S.
History.
-I garnered the most sympathy
for the U.S. after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later
made the U.S. the most hated country in the world, the largest failure of
diplomacy in world history.
-I have set
the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously protest me in
public venues (15 million people), shattering the record for protest against any
person in the history of mankind.
-I am
the first President in U.S. History to order an unprovoked, preemptive attack
and the military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against the will of
the United Nations, the majority of U.S. Citizens, and the world
community.
-I have cut health care
benefits for war veterans and support a cut in duty benefits for active duty
troops and their families in war
time.
-In my State of the Union
Address, I lied about our reasons for attacking Iraq, then blamed the lies on
our British friends.
-I am the first
President in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as
the biggest threat to world peace and
security.
-I am supporting development
of a nuclear “Tactical Bunker Buster,” a
WMD.
-I have so far failed to fulfill
my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden to
justice.
RECORDS AND
REFERENCES:
-All records of my
tenure as governor of Texas are now in my father’s library, sealed and
unavailable for public view.
-All
records of SEC investigations into my insider trading and my bankrupt companies
are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public
view.
-All records or minutes from
meetings that I, or my Vice President,attended regarding public energy policy
are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public
review.
PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE
WHEN VOTING IN 2004.
PLEASE PASS THIS
ON TO EVERY VOTER YOU KNOW.
Posted: Sun - February 1, 2004 at 06:24 PM